So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
