his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
