you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize