I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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