I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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