He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Pants are for mortals
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
