he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
