just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
