We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize