Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
This is classic penis vs brain.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize