Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
