Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
