Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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