So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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