mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
