I have demons in me.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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