so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
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