the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
