I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
third nipple confirmed
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
