taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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