Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
