I cockslap morals
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
