i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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