I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I will pee on everything he values.
Vodka?
Forever.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
