Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
