A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
