so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I had to cum in my sink.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize