sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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