I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Randomize
