could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
