your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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