If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
