do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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