love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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