I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
