you guys were way drunker than both of me
Duck Duck Cougar?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
He? As in you personified your dick?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
