Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
