actually, I'm a sock model
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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