I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize