i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I have surprise drugs for everyone
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
