Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
