and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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