Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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