words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
My life is pants optional.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
