i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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