Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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