So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
