I've blown a few things in my day
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
