lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
