how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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