i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
